Don't cry. Celebrate!

I want to tell you about the most fascinating woman I ever met. Elizabeth Ketter. When I first met her I was too young to remember. I can bet she was happy to see me enter the world.

As I got older (by older I mean 2-3), I have flashes of memories of her. A sweet lady coming to visit us on Poplar Street in Denver. A lovely lady with a warm smile. That’s about it. Like I said flashes.

When we left Denver and moved to Pennsylvania my memories become clearer. Especially one Christmas when she came out to visit. I can’t remember what she gave me as a present that year, but it doesn’t matter. The fact that she came out to see Chris and I was enough. After that we didn’t see her much except for the occasional visits. They were usually too short.

We moved back to Colorado when I was in the fourth grade. I remember going up to a trailer in Aurora to visit her. As always, the lady with the warm smile would welcome Chris and myself and hug to the point of cutting off circulation. Some of my warmest memories were in that trailer. There where times when just Chris and would go there by ourselves. We did not know that our parent’s marriage was in trouble, we were not aware of the ongoing turmoil that was going on with our parents. The lovely lady with the warm smile would not allow us to see it. When we found out much late what had happened, I realized she was protecting us.

During these trips Chris and I would get up to what we did best, PRANK!!! My favorite and the one that we always talk about, was putting her keys in the freezer. Something about that joke was so funny to our pre-pubescent brains. Watching her go nuts trying to find them everywhere in the trailer only to think she was losing her mind by them being in the freezer, still resonates to this day.

As I matured, I found out more about my family history. I found out that this lovely lady with a warm smile fought her way (literally) out of an abusive marriage, raised two kids on her own, and defeated cancer, TWICE!!! She never talked about it. It was not her style to complain.

She would always speak with honesty. When my sister made me the godfather for my youngest niece, she was there. We spent a lot of time that afternoon just talking. We mostly talked about my sister’s three (at the time) kids, politics, science, you name we probably talked about it. Then, she turned to me and said “Jon, I know we don’t have a lot in common, but I want you to know that I have always been very proud of you.” What do you same to that except I love grandma.

Years when by and my visits with her became few and far between. Then in 1998, I took a trip out to Colorado with my then girlfriend Lil. We spent one incredible day together just the three of us. We went to the Denver Art Museum, they gave out little buttons that had DAM on them that she wore with pride all day. We stopped at a 7-11 outside of Denver. Lil went inside to get some water for us and she turned to me and said “I don’t care if you two get married or not. You leave her and I will disown you.” She cut to the chase; once again, it was her style.

We then made our way to Red Rocks. Lil was and always will be afraid of heights, and there was grandma with her walker helping Lil up the side of the mountain. The only thing that she was mad about that whole time we were there was that our dog, Bayliss did not make the trip. That was an amazing day that will be held in my heart forever.

The last time I saw her was around St. Patrick’s Day this year. My wife’s father was playing bag pipes in the parade in Washington. I skipped that to see Chris, the kids, and the lovely lady with a warm smile. The visit was too short in retrospect. I only spoke to her a few more times before her condition finally deteriorated. My last conversation with her was brief and to the point. “Jon,” she said “I don’t want you to cry for me. I don’t know how much time I have left and I want you to know how much I love you.” That was it. I sat there and cried the rest of the day with Lil, Bayliss and our new dog Suzie.

About 11 AM yesterday, Chris called to let me know she had pasted. So without a tear, just like I promised, I celebrate the life of Elizabeth Ketter. The lady that taught me to love the Denver Broncos, watch after my big sister even if she doesn’t need it, love my wife and hug my dogs. She believed in God and in science. I don’t know what happens when you die. My faith tells me one thing, logic tells me something else. I like to think that the truth is somewhere in between. Your soul goes where it should and your energy is released to the rest of world. If there is any justice, she is relaxing in heaven and her energy is alive in all of us.

One day I hope to see her again, the lovely lady with the warm smile. Grandma Peg.

Jon L. Ronneberg
12:44 AM
6/12/06